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The Newly Diagnosed

Public Group active 5 years, 8 months ago ago

We are the newly diagnosed. We don’t know how we got here. We don’t know why we got here. We really don’t know anything. We just know we’re here.

We have so much fear, anxiety, concerns and questions. Please help us begin the journey. We appreciate any advice you veterans can give us.

Please check out the forums section for advice given by others.

Wish I knew that when I started the journey. (11 posts)

  • Profile picture of rick rick said 6 years, 8 months ago:

    “A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.” Lao Tzu Chinese philosopher.

    Although each cancer journey is unique, they all begin with the terrifying words, “You have cancer.” After that moment of sheer terror, you somehow begin to find your way through the darkness. And you come across several key “Aha” moments that make the journey so much easier. Please share some of those moments with the newly diagnosed. We cant have everyone falling in the same potholes, can we.

  • Profile picture of rick rick said 6 years, 8 months ago:

    Always bring the same notebook and pen to every office visit. Come equipped with written questions to ask and be prepared to have someone with you who can transcribe the answers. You will end up with a treasure trove of easily referable information specific to you and your disease .

  • Profile picture of andrea poloni andrea poloni said 6 years, 8 months ago:

    One thing that happened to me was that I became furious after I was told that I had cancer. After all, I had just spent three and a half years in a wheelchair due to horrible hip arthritis. During this time I went to work and taught 6 clases a day and had to look after two sick and dying parents, one of whom I had to put in a nursing home. I had no help. I then took time off from work, went to live with a family member in Virginia, and finally was able to get the hip replacements. After coming back home, getting months of physical therapy, and looking forward to getting back in the classroom, I was told I had not one, but two types of cancer. I just about blew my stack. I didnt want to see anything with a pink ribbon on it because I didnt want to associate myself with the disease. All I am saying is that I think this is a very natural reaction to a cancer diagnosis….being really mad. The next stage for me was to try to control the things that I could….read the information available about my disease. Choose the doctors that I really like. Question and research the treatments that are being proposed to me. Try to eat a healthy diet, and take care of any emotional issues that need attention. These are things we can control. Finally, try to remain positive as much as possible. Despite the fact that I have two types of cancer, I am happier now than I have ever been because I can be independent and walk and drive to all my doctor appointments. This is huge for me. I find pleasure in all things now, and it helps. A relative once said to me, “Stuff is going to happen whether you worry about it or not.” So I do what I can, and then I pray to be guided for the best possible outcome for me and others. That is what is working for me.

  • Profile picture of rick rick said 6 years, 8 months ago:

    Find a medical team that you feel comfortable with, You will be sharing some really personal things so make sure the atmosphere feels warm and safe. Make sure that you feel heard. Getting advice from those around you your doctor, friends and especially anybody in the local medical community that you know. The “inside scoop” is a great way to get to the right team.

  • Profile picture of rick rick said 6 years, 8 months ago:

    Do some homework. Get familiar with the new language of cancer treatment and survivorship. Request literature. It may be too much at the very beginning, but as time moves on and you get your feet back under you, you’ll want to arm yourself with knowledge.

  • Profile picture of rick rick said 6 years, 8 months ago:

    Understand that each individual’s reaction to your diagnosis is unique. Close friends and family may not be there for you. It’s not that they don’t care. They are having trouble coping themselves. It really hurts those closest to you. In time they’ll get there. Surprisingly, people who you dont expect may step up. It’s not theat the love you more. they just “get it”.

  • Profile picture of rick rick said 6 years, 8 months ago:

    Accept help. Remember the joy you get from helping others? Don’t deny others that same joy by refusing their help.

  • Profile picture of Barbara Sheaffer Barbara Sheaffer said 6 years, 8 months ago:

    Ask your physician for the name of a counselor to talk to. It really helps to have someone who is trained to listen and has experience with oncology patients. As Rick points out above, your spouse/best friend/significant other is going through their own journey upon hearing this news and trying to cope with it. My sister in law, who works with cancer patients, pointed out to me early on that not only is treating the cancer important, but “treating” your mind is just as important. Finding a counselor to talk to was one of the best moves I made.

  • Profile picture of Sharon Dwyer Sharon Dwyer said 6 years, 8 months ago:

    Don’t compare your cancer to someone else with same type. Each person’s cancer is unique. Even though you and your friend have the same type, no two are alike; similar but never the same. Treatment will vary according to what stage/grade your cancer is. Everyone gets different side effects from chemotherapy – yours might be minor but your friend might not be so lucky.

  • Profile picture of rick rick said 6 years, 2 months ago:

    HAve those you love read this article on how to talk with someone after a cancer diagnosis.

  • Profile picture of rick rick said 5 years, 8 months ago:

    Great article.,b=facebook